I do not look like this.
Or even like this.
And not until now, as I'm getting older and talking to older people do I realize that all along there's a discrepancy between juniors and woman sizes. Call me stupid.
Where I am now isn't desirable, but it's given me perspective. A 5 in juniors was teeny. I'm many sizes above that now, but I'm not big compared to anyone I know. I just didn't realize it.
Today is the first time I've worn jeans in over a year. I didn't want to buy any after I gained weight. I also didn't want to accept that my body didn't like being so small. I tugged, I cried.
These jeans are old, saved from my bigger days. They're a little loose in the waist but tighter in the leg - always the problem with jeans.
I never fit into jeans properly anyways - my legs are thicker than my waist and I always want the junior style jeans that rise too low.
But I see this as good. I fit into feeling jeans! I didn't have to buy any, and no, I didn't freak out. I'm proud of myself. All progress has not been lost.
I'm more like this.