I found out who got the job over me.
I was bawling my eyes out. I was hysterical.
The other sub, the one who didn't know the deadline of 12 P.M. meant noon and thought it was military time.
Yes, I told her. She scrambled to get everything together and yes, she got the job.
But how could I not have told her? I'm not dwelling on that.
What I'm dwelling on is... I'm not a good enough educator.
No, that's not true.
On paper, she one-ups me: more years in the district, a special ed credential (though it's a different one), and her sub assignment included collaborating with a general education English teacher.
The administration hasn't seen us in our classrooms. Those who have are dumbfounded by this choice.
Now comes the tough part: going back and having her introduced as the new teacher.
The other hard part: Those are my kids.
And what will I do now? Continue to suck it up and go in even more aggressively than ever.
I mean, what else can I do?
But... can you give me something, world? Something to make me like a success?